DEAR ANNIE(R)
BY ANNIE LANE
FOR RELEASE: THURSDAY, JANUARY 30, 2025
Seeking Help for Hoarding Brother-in-Law
Dear Annie: I have a brother-in-law that I need help with but don’t know where to turn. He’s a hoarder. The house he lives in belonged to his parents, but it is now full of junk and he does nothing to keep it clean. He has purchased several items and his garage is overflowing so the new items are left in their boxes outside.
He had a good job, but he’s retired and didn’t have a financial adviser to help him invest. He didn’t trust the stock market and now he has less than $500 in savings and is living on approximately $1,800 per month Social Security. He has four vehicles. None of them run and he can’t find the titles for them.
He is a veteran but can’t find the papers necessary to get help from the VA. He recently received a prescription for Eliquis and didn’t have the $500 to pay for the medicine, so we had to pay for it. My wife wakes up in the middle of the night and can’t sleep because she’s worried what may happen to him.
Who can we talk to or where can we go for help? — Hoarder for Brother-in-Law
Dear Hoarder for Brother-in-Law: It’s important to recognize that hoarding is a mental illness, not something caused by laziness or poor hygiene, and it is closely associated with obsessive-compulsive disorder.
The National Alliance of Mental Illness lists a variety of resources for those struggling with hoarding disorder, including the International OCD Foundation and Hoarding Cleanup, a nationwide directory for hoarding cleanup services. You can visit their website or call them at 1-800-462-7337.
You should also contact your local Veterans Affairs office. Even without his paperwork, they should be able to help you track down his military records and collect the benefits that he is entitled to, which may provide some financial assistance. The VA also offers mental health services, which can help treat your brother-in-law’s hoarding.
Dear Annie: I am writing in response to the woman who said she had become “bored and lonely” in her marriage. Science has shown that if a couple has an adventure together, they tend to bond. So one option for “Bored and Lonely” would be to take up a new exciting sport — say, rough-water kayaking or travel with a purpose, such as volunteering — with her husband. Please don’t dismiss this relationship as over, when a good shot of variety, excitement and companionship may just well be the medicine that fixes “Bored and Lonely.” — Take a Chance
Dear Take a Chance: You are correct! Studies show that feelings of “emotional arousal” — heightened physiological activity as a result of exercise, adventure or even fear — can increase emotional intimacy. It’s certainly worth a shot.
Annie Lane’s second anthology — “How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].
COPYRIGHT 2025 CREATORS.COM